January 26, 2012
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A Problem With a Solution
It doesn’t make sense to me when people are so concerned about gay marriage, yet remain unmindful to the poor being taken advantage of by the wealthy. That may sound a bit liberal, but I say, if we are going to enforce our Christian beliefs, why not all or nothing? Is it for the sake of convenience? Or are people so set in their ways that they are blind to their hypocrisies?
I say, let gays get married, let the rich be rich, but Christians should be willing to live a life counter to the hypocrites of the world. We should be showing a better, more meaningful way of life.
Comments (19)
I always found the biggest hypocrisy about this whole “gay marriage is a threat to the sanctity of the institution of marriage” was that these same people aren’t as rabidly against adultery and divorce.
Jesus talks more about divorce and adultery than he does about gay people, and yet, some of the very religious right politicians are going through marriages like cars. (cough, Newt)
Which is not to say I want them to start protesting about divorce, and standing outside lawyers offices and what not with big signs. But I wish they’d be like, “Oh yeah… gays getting married hurts no one.”
@tgwiy - I have a good friend who was raised by his mother and her lesbian partner. He is the most caring individual I know. He is smart, productive, and he is going far in life. Oh yeah, he is also straight. It makes me wonder what the religious right are afraid of… I’m fairly conservative, myself, but it doesn’t seem to add up, does it?
@jmallory - I don’t understand it.
It seems like they think that if you let gay people marry, then straight people won’t be allowed to get married. Which isn’t true.
But then there’s the concern that if you let gay people marry, you’ll be forcing churches to marry them, which is untrue. The Catholic Church can choose not to marry anyone for whatever reason they want. They could say no to a two Catholics because one isn’t a “devout” enough one. They could say no to a Catholic and a Jew. Churches will still have that “no” power if they want.
Or there’s the concern that if a gay couple wants a photographer for their wedding, but that photographer doesn’t agree with gay marriage and that gay couple goes to another photographer who does agree with gay marriage, that it’s hurting people because of their beliefs. Well, I wouldn’t want a racist photographer photographing an inter-racial wedding. Same deal.
And if it’s a civil marriage (like one I plan on getting someday) big deal! I never got it. I grew up with gay people being able to get married and my country is still in one piece.
J ma man, this post is awesome.
Gingrich divorced his first wife from her hospital bed after a cancer operation to go sleep with his mistress, who he married the same year then divorced from her hospital bed when she was diagnosed with MS to go sleep with his new mistress because she wouldn’t give him an open marriage.
When the last half of this hit the news his campaign (which was on life support) got a huge surge. So did herman cain’s campaign after it was found out he was groping women against their will while having an affair with another woman for 15 years (and of course his wife).
The conservative mentality seems to be that you can have as many people in your bed as you want so long as one of them isn’t gay or a democrat.
@jmallory - It’s just hatred. They hate gays, they hate the poor. It’s what happens when your worldview isn’t based on compassion and empathy, but on putting people into separate moral categories.
@tgwiy - Those arguments are just flimsy rationalizations. You can tell if something is someone’s reason for believing something of it’s a rationalization based on how they respond to evidence against it. If they immediately look for another justification for their view or are hostile or dismissive, it’s psychology you’re dealing with, not logic.
It’s like when obama was newly elected and the tea party was crying “we’re not gonna take these taxes anymore” after they’d just been given the largest single tax cut in history (part of the stimulus bill), a guy stood up at one of their rallies and said “how many people here make less than a hundred thousand dollars a year?” They all cheered, and he said “under obama’s tax plan you will pay less this year than you paid last year.” Now if they were truly concerned about their taxes they would be like “wow, really? What are we doing here?” Or they would feel relief. But if it just pokes holes in a flimsy rationalization then they would be angry – and they were pissed and booed him.
@jmallory - People were (and are) terrified of black people for no good reason too. It’s more emotional than rational.
I don’t think that folks concern about gay marriage is necessarily because of its sinfulness (despite that being the way they may try to describe why they object to it.) Rather, it challenges an understanding of marriage that requires two unequal parties (an inequality that is not threatened by any heterosexual marriage no matter how short term or dysfunctional.) Many heterosexual marriages are not, in fact unequal, I would argue, and people who engage in a marriage of true mutuality are much more likely to see gay marriage as a perfectly legitimate mode of family relationship. But there is a serious undercurrent in the US (and a majority in other places in the world) which continues to see women as inherently inferior to men. And so for two people of the same gender to love one another, they imagine that one party is “acting” the woman/inferior and the other “acting” the man/dominant force – which is incredibly distasteful to them – unnatural. And I agree – that is an ugly proposition. But no less ugly to me than the biological “woman” and “man” acting those roles. Whereas the sin argument takes that system of hierarchy as good and true and thus “sinless”.
The idea that LGBT anything is the problem is the REAL problem. I’ve been telling Christians for years the LGBT movement is a symptom which becomes a problem. The problem is broken relationships with God creating broken human relationships. When the family becomes broken we see children losing their way and becoming confused. This confusion often leads to sexual confusion. LGBT people are born to “straight” couples. It is the increasing brokenness of families which leads to the real confusion. If Christians want to do something of real value they should spend all the time their now wasting contesting gay marriage, and put it toward building strong marriages and families. Strong family bonds cut down on all sorts of problems, and strengthen society.
Now I do not believe any religious institution should be made to perform or even accept gay marriage, but opposition is pointless.
Well said.
@BenelliMan - Thanks
@gayXianmom - I liked what you had to say, though I have mixed feelings about it. I would say that you are right when it comes to most evangelical denominations. For people like my conservative Methodist Christian father for instance, he doesn’t really get too involved in the stereotypical gender roles for marriage. He was a single father for long enough to know that he had to play both mother and father, so he realizes that to many families, the idea of “gender roles” are completely asinine. He does, however, believe that homosexuality is a sin, simply in its practice. I think you can probably see where I am getting mixed emotions about your comment…
@agnophilo - I think that in most cases, you are right. It is more emotional than rational…
@Such_are_you - I follow you 100%… as usual
@bmojsilo - Thanks!
@jmallory - In what case is it more rational than emotional?
@agnophilo - I try to stay clear of blanket statements. That’s all.
@jmallory - Fair enough – I have a pet peeve about that too. I just thought you had something in mind.
@jmallory - Hi Jimmy, I hear your mixed feelings, although maybe I too have mixed feelings about your reply
I was a single parent for a number of years too, but that’s really not the same thing as playing both father and mother – at least in my experience. We are who we are and while being the sole parent stretches you thin, it does not transform your gender. The kinds of roles I’m talking about are not who cleans the toilet bowl and who changes the spark plugs, they are about what happens interiorly when two adults attempt to lovingly conform to one another.
Because the basic fact is most people including so called Christians worship at the altar of The Almighty Dollar and Mitt Romeny recent statement about not really caring for poor people is a sad indication of this.
How about we let the gays marry the poor and then both will be taken care of.
@TheTheologiansCafe - Only if the rich gays marry the gay poor