If you haven’t read them yet, check out part I and part II by clicking the links!

So, my friend started dating Tesia. The only thing I could do was continue being her friend and pretend I was ok with it. I knew the kind of guy my friend was. I knew how he’d hurt her. I knew what he was prone to do. But I felt like I had to tell Tesia what she wanted to hear.

We talked about her relationship a lot. In fact, I’m sure she hung out with me more than she hung out with him. I was ok with that. But it still hurt to be with her knowing she was with him. But she would always ask me if he was good for her and she would ask me if she was doing the right thing by being with him. I assured her that everything was fine… of course, I was biting my tongue the entire time.

I dealt with this for like a month and a half. And each day was more painful than the next. But one day, she suspected he was cheating on her… and she was right. This is the kind of guy he was. I knew it… but I couldn’t bare to hurt her by telling her the truth.

She didn’t know how to handle this situation. She knew that the end of her relationship was coming, but she didn’t want to be the one to break it off. She told me that her boyfriend wanted to talk to her about something…”Do you think he’s going to break up with me?” she asked.

“No. He couldn’t do that to you…” I lied. I knew that it was going to happen to. I didn’t want to hurt her. I just wanted to support her the best I could.

The next day, she came to me and told me that he broke up with her. She still didn’t know for sure if he’d cheated on her… but everyone knew he did. I was happy, but still, I was hurting for her. She didn’t seem to take it badly, though. That was good news.

The months went by. Tesia and I only grew closer together, although I was still afraid to make a move. By this time, she was in a Punk Rock band with a few of her friends; The Revenge. I would always follow the band wherever they went and it was blast to be with them… but I really only wanted to be with her.

May 3rd, 2003
This was the day of a mutual friend’s birthday party. Tesia and another friend, Lynn, picked up my cousin, Travis, and me. Lynn was a great friend. Whenever I needed a ride to be with Tesia, she was there for me. She did the same thing for Tesia. Also, Lynn was one of my only friends who knew how I felt about Tesia. She was more than supportive of it and always tried to help in any way she could.

but back to the party…

Tesia looked more beautiful than ever. To me, no one else was around. It was just the two of us. We both were extra flirty with each other that whole night. We got in tickle fights… and of course, I let her win. She had me pinned to the ground as she was tickling me. Yes… I liked it. This thing happened all night. I went home knowing that it was time to make my move.

May 6th, 2003
Lynn and I went to see Tesia throw shot put and discuss for the track team. She was the best our school had. I wasn’t much of a sports fan. I’m still not… so I just wanted to see her throw and leave. While I was there, I told Lynn that I was planning on making a move as soon as the track meet was over. She told me she’d say something to Tesia to test how she’d feel about it.

When the meet was over, we walked from the track to my house. It was only about a quarter of a mile away. As soon as we got there, we all laid out on my trampoline; something we did frequently. Tesia said she needed to get some water. Lynn followed. I knew what was going on… I was excited and my heart was beating harder than ever before. Half a minute later, Lynn came back out, kind of in a hustle, shaking her head. My heart dropped.

“Not a good idea right now, Jimmy.”

Lynn went back in the house… and I laid on my trampoline with my heart broken… I just stared up at the clouds through the trees… praying to God that I didn’t make a fool out of myself.

Tesia came outside and sat on the trampoline with me. I couldn’t look her in the eyes.

“Jimmy, I like you sometimes… but not all the time. I’m not sure if I’d want to ruin our friendship with a relationship I’m not even sure would work. I’m sorry.”

I couldn’t say anything. I just kept staring at the clouds.

Continue to Part IV

When you have a position on government like mine, you have to get used to the annoyances that come along with it…

I did not vote on Tuesday. I have a moral and spiritual conviction to refrain from voting. This bothers some people… but when it comes to politics, you can’t help but annoy someone.

One thing that bothers me about the internet is that it’s too easy to get our opinions out there… as if our opinions really matter…

For instance, Tuesday, a friend of mine posted this as his facebook status:

‎“(getting on soap box) to all my friends who complain about politics and don’t vote today YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM! (stepping off the soap box) have a nice day ”

This only bothered me slightly. Naturally, I put in my opinion, but it soon got ugly… Politics bring out the worst in people because everyone has an opinion about how the world should work.

As a Christian, I try to look at everything with a Christian lens. I follow wherever that takes me and I try to not let my personal feelings start leading the way. In all reality, economically speaking, my flesh is very conservative, but my spirit cries for altruism. I realize the contradiction here, but I choose to follow my spirit because my spirit is being lead and convicted by Christ. And Jesus tells me that God takes care of the lilies and the sparrows, surely he will take care of me too.

All that aside, to me, it seems like much of the church feels like they can’t make a difference in this world unless they vote. But I can’t help but see voting as counterproductive. I mean, speaking as a Christian pacifist, if I vote for a president who supports war, blood is on my hands regardless of his stance on anything else. I can’t deal with that.

But what really doesn’t make sense to me is this phrase:
“I don’t care who you vote for; just go vote!”

For one, that is a complete lie in most cases. Those who say that really do care who’s being voted for. That’s the whole point in voting. They will spend precious time in their day arguing for their values, supporting their party. And when the people they didn’t want to win get elected, they don’t take it well… and then accuse those who voted for them of being ignorant, communist/fascist, etc…
So when people actually choose not to vote, they hear about it too for not voting in the first place. Really, we are innocent bystanders acting on our convictions.

But lets dissect this a bit. Democrats tend to have a liberal point of view because of the way they experience the world. Same with Republicans. Same with independents, or whatever else is in between. But it doesn’t matter what we are because to someone, we are all wrong. That’s the way the game works. But when a person doesn’t want to play the game, the person is accused of not caring enough.

Seriously, there are a lot of us that really do care what happens in this world. We just believe in different ways of changing it. Granted, there are some that don’t care. That’s their thing. The important thing is following your own conviction on the matter. 

I care about bringing change into the world, but I don’t believe that change should start in the government. I think it can only start in the church. When we mix politics and religion, we get ugly. And ugly should not be involved in the church.

I don’t mind different opinions. I’m glad they are out there. No one can be 100% certain that what they believe is in fact the correct way. So, is it possible for us all to share all of our differing opinions without arguments or name-calling? I’m skeptical, but deep down, I think it can be done.

If you missed “Part I”- click here

And the story continues…

When I was in the 8th grade, I was in our Junior High musical, “The Creepy Creeps of Pilgrim Road”. It was basically a rip off of “The Addams Family”. I had a pretty decent sized role as a goat-man named Billy, who served as a butler to the “Creep” family. Also Tesia, my arch nemesis, had a role playing the grandmother of the family. This was ok, because I didn’t have to dialogue with her too much. But after a couple months of being around each other all the time after school at both play practice and youth group, I eventually gave in to talking to her some. I decided that I should stop judging this book by her cover and I actually got to know her… and after all the problems I had with her, I found out I was wrong… she was alright.

9th grade came and went. Tesia and I talked… but I wouldn’t have considered her a friend at the time. Just someone I’d hang out with at church now and again. My sophomore year, however, things really began to change.
I was a punk rocker. I had punk rock friends. I liked punk rock girls. I saw how Tesia’s image began to change from this nerdy, goodie-two-shoes, junior high girl to this non-conformist punk rock rebel chick. That’s when I really started talking to her.

I didn’t have a crush on her quite yet… but I did think she was cute. We would hang out all the time- at school, at church, and at punk shows. Every now and then, I’d go to her house and hang out too. Every Wednesday night, we’d go to Burger King and chill. We’d steal the salt shakers. We ended up collecting them, hiding them in the cabinets of our Youth Annex. I would also meet at her locker every morning and we’d sit in the hallway and talk before classes started. We called that our pow wow. We were also in the high school musicals together. We would always hang out with each other. She even did my makeup when performance time came. I liked it that she was giving me attention by putting makeup on me. Even though it made me cry… (I have sensitive eyes and eyeliner brought the tears out)

She had become my best friend.

I remember one day, our youth group was on our yearly winter retreat. Tesia and I were sitting next to a fire. We were pealing oranges and throwing the peal into the fire. I remember watching her… died black hair, 8 or 9 peircings in each ear, pins and patches all over her sweatshirt, eyeliner, studded belt, fishnets,  writing in permanent marker all over her arms… she was beautiful. That’s not when I found out that I liked her…. that’s when I found out that I loved her. I remember that night, after hearing our speaker for the retreat give a talk, a friend and I went back to our cabin and began talking about girls. He was talking about his latest heart break, but then I mentioned my newest heart-win.

“I really like Tesia…” I said.
“Me too.” he replied.

Great… competition.

To top it off, when I went back to hang out with Tesia, she told me about her crush… and it wasn’t me, but another friend whom I brought to the retreat.

More competition…

I didn’t let this stop me though. See, the way I handled my crushes was to just be myself. I was kinda shy. I didn’t get overly possessive and I didn’t try to make it obvious… but I was still too shy to tell my best friend what I thought about her. I couldn’t properly express it to her. I told a friend that he could tell her for me… and he did so over MSN. That didn’t change things between us though… and as far as she knew, she had no idea that I knew she knew. You know? Our friendship just got stronger… and we could tell each other anything… except, I couldn’t express my feelings to her.

One day, I created “The Cool List”. This was a compiling of the coolest kids in school… there were only four of us. Because I didn’t know how to let her know what I thought about her, I tried to show her in small ways. For instance, the cool list was written specifically for her. I put her at #1. I was #2. My cousin Travis was #3. Another friend of ours was #4. But I put her at the top of the list… because to me, she was the coolest person I knew.

Soon enough, Tesia found a guy to be her boyfriend. It was the kid I talked to when I discovered my feelings for Tesia… He got her first. My life was shattered.

Click here for Part III.

My wife asked me if I could blog about how we ended up together. There were things that I was remembering that she wasn’t, so she thought it would be a good idea if I wrote them out. I agreed… plus, there are many people on Xanga, eager to read a sappy love story. Here’s mine.

When I was in the sixth grade, I heard of a new girl who came into town. She was a grade below me, which makes me believe that my brother must have mentioned her in a conversation we were having because he was a grade below me. I don’t know how else I would have heard of her. But I don’t think I liked the things I’ve heard about her. When I would pass her in the halls at school, or see her at recess, I knew to stay clear of her. She was kind of nerdy.

Her name was Tesia (pronounced Tesha- like Ke$ha). I thought it was a weird name. I didn’t like it. And in my opinion, it was a good name to fit a nerd.

Towards the end of the school year, our school had our “Invention Convention”. Here, the kids in the elementary school could choose to invent something for the sake of fun and education. I remember looking through all the inventions that were submitted into the Invention Convention thinking, “Man, I wish I was clever enough to have made that… and that… and that…”

… but then I saw it…………..

It was the invention that won first place. It was called, “The Keep Warm Keep Cool T-Shirt”. The T-shirt had strategically placed pockets sewn into it in which one can insert ice packs or foot warmers, depending on whether he or she wanted to keep cool or warm. I saw it’s display and looked at how it was created… and I saw pictures… of Tesia and her friend… creating this t-shirt… immediately, I thought it was the worst idea in the competition. To this day, I still tease her about it, even though I must admit that for a couple of fifth grade girls, it was a really good idea. (Please don’t tell her I said that…)

Later on, when I was in the seventh grade, I found out that she was going to my church. This upset me because I knew that the next year, she would be in the same youth group as me… and since she was a nerd, and I was too cool for my own shoes, I wanted to avoid her at all costs… she is the one person in my life that I can ever remember hating, honestly.

I remember on New Years Eve that year, my younger brother, my cousin Travis, and I went to a friend’s house. We were friends with her because we went to the same church and had mutual friends. There were kids there that I didn’t really know and there were kids there that I was really good friends with… mainly, other kids from my church. As I was hanging out with friends, I noticed that Tesia was there.

I thought to myself, “Ok, this isn’t a big deal. I’ll just avoid her like I always do…”

Directly after that, a friend suggested we all play “Truth or Dare”.

I remember that after a few rounds, Tesia was up. The host of the party got to ask “Truth or Dare”…

She picked “Dare”.

And the dare?????

“I dare you to kiss Jimmy.”

I laughed “Hahaha…”

then… “wait.. I’m Jimmy…”

“Umm, I don’t want to- I’m not- I just-” I tried to explain.

My friend pulled me aside and said, “Jimmy, I know you aren’t comfortable, but it would really mean a lot to me if you’d just let her kiss you. Can you do that for me?”

“Uh… No…”

“Well… Just let her give you a kiss on the cheek. It won’t be that bad. Please…. just do that.”

She should have known that I was uncomfortable… I tend to show my frustration by my hesitation, my stuttering, and my pacing… all of that was involved…. but I gave in.

“Ok…”

So… the game went on. My arch-nemesis kissed me on the cheek. I was uncomfortable, but I toughed it out.

That was the most humiliating moment of my life at that point.

So, I found out that this girl I’ve despised for the last year and a half actually had a crush on me the entire time I was avoiding her. The next year, she came to our youth group and I still avoided her as much as I could…. even though we had mutual friends. There was even a time when my step-mom picked me up from school and we saw Tesia walking a dog. She said, “Hey Jimmy, isn’t that your friend from chruch?”

“No, ” I said. “that’s Tesia…”

Yeah… I was kind of a jerk…

This continued until I got in high school– but you’ll have to click here for part II!

When I was in school, I got along with just about everybody. I was kind of a slacker, but I was very social. I loved being a class clown and I loved being around people.

In the 8th grade, I had a friend that introduced me to Ska. I loved it, but eventually, that got me hooked on Punk. From 10th-11th grade, my identity was wrapped in punk rock. I went to local punk shows as often as I could. I tried to start a band (with no success) and I even spiked my hair (with no success). But regardless of my failures, Punk rock played a huge role for me growing up. There was nothing more freeing than a punk show.

I was so gross… but I loved it! We used to spit on each other… because it was fun… we would punch and push each other at shows… because it was fun… we would be gross… sweaty, bloody, covered in other people’s spit… I would sneeze in my hands and wipe whatever came out on my pants. It was great. It was great not to care. We would draw all over our arms, legs, and clothes in permanent marker. Our clothes would be fully decorated with safety pins as well as patches and buttons from our favorite bands. We wore spikes and studs. We didn’t care what other people thought… We were happy and free…. that was all that mattered. There was an energy within the punk community… It was a freeing energy.

Eventually, this is how I fell in love with my wife (which I will blog about later).

When I was a senior in high school, I found my love for Nirvana, and soon after, Grunge in general. That became my identity my senior year. I grew my hair out and died it black. I stopped eating and got extremely skinny, I wore flannel jackets over extra large shirts, and sported holes in my pants. I also fell in love with Airwalks and Converse at this time. I was still pretty gross, but it was clear that I was starting to grow up.

It wasn’t until my freshman year of college where I started to realize that there was more to life than feeling free. We have limitations in the real world, and the real world was finally becoming real to me. Those experiences played a crucial part in who I would eventually become, but I found the importance of toning down the things that may seem socially unacceptable.

It was at this time that I began to put my identity in Christ. I let him mold me into the person he wanted me to be. I’m still a work in progress, but aren’t we all?
I began reading, studying, praying, and getting involved in church. This lead me to my call in youth ministry.

Youth Ministry is fun because I can still let the little disgusting punk out of me every once in awhile. I can let the searching grunge kid out too. But I have it toned down. I guess, I know how to be a kid when being a kid is necessary. I know how to be an adult when being an adult is necessary… I’m pretty sure I can thank my punk roots for that.

I went to a friend’s old Xanga account. She doesn’t post anymore, and hasn’t since April of 2007. I looked through her subscriptions because I know about 95% of the Xangans personally. There were 90 altogether, including my friend’s blog that I had visited. Out of those 90 people, 3 are still posting on Xanga. That’s my wife t_sheffield, my cousin crevis05, and myself. Most everybody else ditched somewhere between 2006-2008.

I don’t know if the question is, “Is Xanga dying?” anymore. When something is dying, there is a chance for revival. I think Xanga may already be dead. Maybe only a miracle can save Xanga now.

What do you think? Is Xanga dead? Can she be fixed?

One thing that I am, frankly, tired of seeing are Christians who excuse their hate, bitterness, and resentment towards those who are considered to be ungodly. All over the Gospel of Christ, we see how Jesus handled sinners. One overarching theme that we see in scripture is God’s heart towards the lost. This can’t be seen more clearly than in the gospels.

The word “gospel”, itself, actually means “Good News”. And what exactly is that good news?
Well, in Luke 4 we see that Jesus quoted the prophet Isaiah, saying

“The Spirit of the Lord is on me,
      because he has anointed me
      to preach good news to the poor.
   He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners
      and recovery of sight for the blind,
   to release the oppressed,
      to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.”

Directly after preaching this, Jesus admits that this is a prophecy about himself. So we see that Christ came to set free those who are poor, imprisoned, blind, and oppressed.

Then in Matthew 9, we read about a pharisee who asked one of Jesus’ disciples why Jesus eats with the sinners and the tax collectors.
Jesus heard this and replied, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. But go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy, not sacrifice.‘ (quoting Hosea 6:6) For I have not come to call the righteous, but the sinners.”

So now, we can add to the list that Jesus also came to heal the sick and minister to the sinners.

And of course, must also add to the list two other things: He came as a representation of what God intended for mankind (meaning it is our duty as Christians to attempt to live life in a way that he teaches), and he came as a sacrifice for our sin. That is most important because humankind can not live in righteousness apart from God.

Throughout the entirety of scripture, we see a theme that God is displeased with humankind’s attempt at righteousness. And shouldn’t he be displeased? After all, true righteousness can’t come from ourselves, but from the One who is truly righteous and good. This is why Jesus was so quick to chastise those who pointed out the speck in another’s eye. It’s because false righteousness is a giant tree trunk in the way. We can’t possibly see the speck in another person’s eye.

In Luke 7:36-50, we read a story of Jesus eating at a pharisee’s house. The pharisee’s name was Simon (not to be confused with Simon Peter).
While Jesus was eating with Simon, a woman came into the house. The scripture tells us that this woman was a sinful woman… she was probably a prostitute. We don’t really know, but what we do know is that she had lived a sinful life, but she came into this house, in search of Jesus.

Back then, it wasn’t good for a woman to travel alone, without the companionship of her husband or her father. This just wasn’t done. It was considered to be trashy. It would especially be looked down on if a woman were to come alone to a dinner, uninvited. But this is exactly what we read in this story. To make things worse, the woman was already known for being a woman of ill repute.

When the woman came to Jesus in Simon’s house, she came behind Jesus. Filled with sorrow, and feeling unclean, she wept. She cried enough tears that she began to cleans Jesus’ feat with them, drying them off with her hair, which she had let down. Also in that time, a woman letting her hair down in front of any man except for her husband was also looked down on. It could almost be the equivalent of a woman removing her shirt in public today. But she got down on her knees, weeping, cleansing Jesus’ feet with her tears and drying his feet with her hair. She wasn’t ceasing to kiss his feet, as she poured perfume on them.

Simon couldn’t believe what he was seeing. He had heard that Jesus was a prophet, but here he is, letting this unclean woman touch him. Simon said to himself, “If this man were a prophet, surely he’d know what kind of woman is touching him! How can he let her do that?”

Jesus turned to Simon and said, “Simon, I’ve got something to tell you.”
“Teach me” Simon replied.

Jesus went on to tell a parable:

“Two men owed money to a certain moneylender. One owed him five hundred denarii, and the other fifty. Neither of them had the money to pay him back, so he canceled the debts of both. Now which of the debtors will love the moneylender more?”

Simon replied, “Well, I suppose the one who owed the most money.”

“You’ve judged correctly” Jesus said. Then he turned to the woman while still talking to Simon:

“Simon, do you see this woman? I came to your house and you did not give me any water for my feat. But this woman who came to me wet my feet with her tears and dried them with her hair. You did not great me with a kiss, but since she came in, she has not stopped kissing my feet. You did not put oil on my head, but she has put perfume on my feet. This is why I must let you know that all of her many sins have been forgiven, for she loved much. But to those whom have been forgiven little will love little.”

Jesus then told the woman, “Your sins are forgiven. Your faith has saved you. Go in peace.”

Here we have Jesus blessing a sinner, while he is chastising someone who is religious. And why is that? It’s because she was weak enough to realize that she needed Jesus, while Simon was too stubborn to see the error of his self-righteousness.

When was the last time you were so moved by Christ that you’ve examined your own life and broke into tears knowing how sinful you are and how perfect He is?

It’s easy for Christians to slip in the mode of self-righteousness… and I’m as guilty as any. But when we come to realize who it was that Christ came for, we develop a better understanding of who He is and how we are to live. Can we learn to love those who are trapped in sin? Can we learn that in our sin, we are equal, just as we are in our salvation? Can we learn to bless those who need blessing the most?
Of course we can. Jesus has shown us that this is possible.

Earlier today, I read a post by TheTheologiansCafe that asked if a 19 year old man deserves a 10 year prison sentence for having sex with a 14 year old girl. This, naturally, is a topic that is prone to grinding gears. I know someone who is in a similar situation, and I’d just like to talk about that in this post.

About 5 years ago, my sister had a friend whom we’ll call John. John had his issues, but was for the most part, a very polite, humble guy. He was 18 years old, I was 19. He and I didn’t hang out too much, but he was very interested in Christianity (although he wasn’t proclaiming the faith), so he would come to me with his questions and comments about what I believe. I’ve had many interesting conversations with him about my faith, his beliefs, and his struggles, but he wasn’t ready for a commitment to Christ.

One day, my sister came home crying because she found out that John was arrested for having sex with his girlfriend. That didn’t make sense to me, so I asked for clarification:
“Did he rape her?”
“No,” my sister replied, “but that’s what she told her dad!”
“Well how old was she?” I asked.
“14…”
“Oh…”

So the story goes: 18 year old John had a 14 year old girlfriend. John had sex with her and her dad came home. Her dad caught them in the act and kicked John out. John left and the 14 year old girl covered her butt by saying that John had raped her. Then her dad called the cops, they found John and he was arrested for raping a 14 year old girl.

What a sad scenario this was…

John spent some time in jail and then was released, but put on probation. He wasn’t allowed to hang out with anyone under 18. He was also told that he had to register as a sex offender for the rest of his life. At the same time, he needed a job, so I helped him get hired at the Movie Gallery, where I was working at the time.

When he got the job, he had only been working there for days when the word got out that a sex offender was working at the Movie Gallery. Another employee came up to me during work and said, “Hey, did you hear who the manager just gave a job to? Some child molester! Why would she allow some creep like that to work here?”

This got on my nerves. I looked at him and I said, “Yeah… I know who she hired, and I helped get him this job that he needed. No, he isn’t perfect, but you also don’t know the whole story.” I went on to tell him what actually happened, and he ended up apologizing. However, only a few weeks later, John was fired.

I asked my manager what happened and she just replied, “Oh… well, we didn’t need him anymore.” And that was that… until she hired someone else a week later… Needless to say, I think it had more to do with the fact that he is a sex offender rather than not needing his employment anymore.

That whole ordeal made me realize something. This guy has to register as a sex offender for the rest of his life… and for the rest of his life, people are going to misrepresent him, misinterpret him, misunderstand him, and falsely judge him. And all of this is because his girlfriend at the time lied to her dad and said that John had raped her.

John had since violated his probation when he went out with a group of his younger friends. He was sent to jail for a couple years and was recently released. I haven’t heard from him yet, however, my sister has told me that he wants me to get a hold of him. I probably should…

Yes, John made stupid decisions. He shouldn’t have had sex with a minor. He should have found friends his own age. He should have gotten his act together…

So, because of one stupid mistake along with a lie from a person he trusted, his life is ruined. And people are going to judge him for the rest of his life, and probably bully him. And at this time, a time when he needs us the most, what are the Christians going to do? I know that many will judge him and bully him… because I’ve already seen it happen… and they are going to hate him… and call him worthless… and treat him like he should have never been born. I believe his punishment fit the crime, but for some reason, he has to deal with extra punishment… more punishment than he can bear… and that extra punishment is undeserved.

This isn’t a situation where a guy acted on his strange fantasies of young children… This was an unfortunate situation where a guy had sex with a girl who was 3 1/2 years younger than him and was later falsely blamed for rape.

I get sad whenever I think about his story… and I wonder how many other people out there have a similar story. And I wonder if it’s possible to treat sex offenders as if they are worthy of love… I wonder if it’s possible that we can love them the way God does… I wonder if it’s possible to bless them instead of curse them… I wonder who prays for them…

I hate the phrase, “Christianity isn’t a religion. It’s a relationship!” Come on… give me a break! All human hearts are designed for worship… and in some way, we are all worshiping something, whether you want to call it God, or Man, or Allah, or Vishnu. Our hearts are wired to spirituality. So it can be said that to some degree, we are all religious. There is just something in us that cries out for the meaning religion gives. Regardless, I hate that phrase.

I think it would bother me less if the people who use this phrase didn’t act so religious… I do have a new understanding of that saying now, though. Lately, I’ve been paying deep attention to the way Jesus taught the religious leaders of his time… and then I would pay attention to the way he would teach and treat the sinners of his time. Needless to say, he always lifted up the sinners above those that were religious. And this should come as no surprise. Why? Well… I’ve come to the conclusion that when Jesus died for our sins, he took religion with him.

This makes complete sense when you think about it. In the beginning, there was no religion. God created man, and man worshiped nothing but God. There was no government. There was no violence. Everything created was good.

Then Man disobeyed God… He figured he could be just like God, thus, worshiping himself. This started religion. There had to be a system set in place to assure that it would be quite difficult to worship anything besides God… But even the things that God created became gods to His people. We have the tendency to worship the created instead of the creator. You see this with the bronze serpent God had Moses craft (Read about Nehushtan). Eventually, because of the snakes miraculous healing powers, the Jews began to worship it instead of God, who told Moses to put it in place. Likewise, much of what Christianity has adopted over the years has become idolatrous (try taking down the altar at a liturgical service, or take out the media from a contemporary service… watch the backlash people tend to give because they are out of their comfort zones). And throughout the old testament, you can see how clear it is that people wanted to worship more than just God. The Jews wanted a king. God wanted to be their king, but he gave in. Solomon wanted to build a giant temple. God was satisfied with a small portable altar… because He wanted to be the temple. God, of course, gave in again. The Temple was built. Needless to say, Jesus said that the temple would be destroyed… and it was. This, I believe, shows the death of religion.

When Jesus came to teach, the people weren’t worshiping God effectively. The Pharisees were worshiping the Law, the Sadducees were worshiping ritual and tradition, and the Zealots were worshiping nation and pride. All of these systems, God had placed into the Jewish community for a reason, but the people lifted these idols up above the heart of God. So when Jesus began to teach, he was showing that he came to fulfill all that. God was saying, “You don’t need this system anymore to follow me! I’ve given you a better way. A way that’s not religion. It’s the way of my heart!” God knew that religion caused more harm than good. It separated his people from Him.

Following God’s heart doesn’t require religion. It requires faith. There are no systems in place that take over God’s saving grace through Jesus’ death on the cross. Sure we have our sacraments. Baptism and Communion are important to those that follow Christ, but they never take place over what Christ has already done. They are there only to show the commitment we’ve made to follow Christ. They show that we are willing to live an obedient life. The same goes with attending Church. We go to have fellowship with other believers… not because we have to, but because it’s good to. All the systems that are in place are allowed to change… because it isn’t the system we love. It’s God. This is why there is so much paganism rooted into the church. We’ve adopted it so that converts would be comfortable following Christ. That’s why Paul was so awesomely effective at witnessing. He knew that it was who you worship that was important, not how you worship. This is not to say that our traditions aren’t important… but they are only as important as we make them. Can they become too important to our faith? YES! But sometimes, our lack of tradition can get in the way of our faith as well. We just don’t want to make an idol out of anything.

With religion, the heart of God rarely comes first. We see people skewing the will of God to suit their own needs in religion. I think this is why it’s easy to try to justify the way we neglect to follow Christ’s teachings. Religion has an agenda… and if it doesn’t suit our own, it tends to breed anger (which is not a fruit of the spirit, contrary to popular belief). I’m guilty of that as well.

Christ’s coming to earth has shown us what God’s intention for man was. If we didn’t understand what he meant, he explained it, and if we still didn’t understand, he made it evident in his own life. He wanted to take us back to the beginning. Back to heaven. Or back to the Garden. Back to God. He came to show us that God is our King. He is our nation. We have no need for violence. We have no need for retaliation. We have no need for religion. We have no need for the system. We just need him. Everything in between, we put into place… is it necessary? Well… That’s between you and God.

Something inside me just wants to talk about Jesus. We don’t talk about Jesus enough. We are too busy debating on what’s sinful and what church holds the best guidelines for its followers. What about Jesus? Why is it rare to hear stories about Jesus in church? Why are sermons designed for self-help? Why do we try to fight with our culture? Why do we compete? Isn’t teaching about Jesus the best way to reach out?

He’s the church reformer we’ve been waiting for. He will get us out of this mess the North American church is in. Forget nationality. Forget who’s right and wrong. Forget about politics in the state and in the church, and forget about the culture. Tell me about Jesus!

What can you tell me about Jesus? I don’t care if I know it already. What can you tell me?